Gosh, writing all of these blog posts is exhausting! I need to take a personal day.
Psych! I will actually be talking about the subject of mental health.
A lot of people don't really understand clinical depression. They're like, oh you're just sad? Just sad doesn't even begin to cover it. Everything in your life can be going wonderfully, but if you have legit depression you'll still be miserable all the time. It's not something you can control. "Fake it til you make it" doesn't work with depression. Having depression can screw up everything in your life. Your relationships, your job, you name it and depression will mess it up.
I've had diagnosed depression and anxiety since I was 14. I was taking antidepressants and going to therapy from 14-17, when I decided to stop doing both. I don't really remember why, but things were okay for a while. And then it wasn't.
I decided that I should talk to my doctor about maybe going back on antidepressants when every day turned into a struggle over whether or not I should quit my job and just lay in bed all day.
I've been taking Prozac for about a month now. Things have REALLY improved, or at least the way I see things has improved. I'm sleeping better, eating better, exercising, and I doubt I would have the motivation for any of this without medication to pull me out of the hole of depression that I was sinking in. It's also helping with my anxiety. I have energy and can relax! It's an amazing feeling. Coming out of depression is like living in a dark room and suddenly someone opens the blinds and lets the sun in. Cheesy, I know, but that's how I've been feeling.
Sometimes I feel crappy about having to take medicine in order to feel normal, but then I remind myself that mental health and physical health work best when they're working together. Prozac can function as an appetite suppressant which helps curb my boredom snacking and my mealtime overeating. I'm happier so I'm more motivated to cook from scratch. I'm sleeping better and less anxious so I'm no longer physically and mentally exhausted every day and have the energy to work out, which leads to endorphins which make me even more happy! And it goes around and around and around.
I'm sharing this incredibly personal information on my blog not to make excuses for myself or anything like that, but rather to share something that has been a struggle in my life for a long time, and something that I'm finally happy to say that I'm successfully working through!
This has been a fun week for me! If anything I've said hasn't been helpful, I hope that it will at least have been interesting :)
I'm glad you wrote about this. It's so easy for people to say that you get to choose to be happy. But in most cases of depression, you can't break the negative cycle on your own. Choosing to use your resources and get outside help is not a sign of weakness, but strength. Congrats for things improving in your life!
ReplyDeleteO my goodness, I had no idea!! I had depression symptoms in January and you're right, it's not just sadness, it's like everything isn't worth doing anymore, even the stuff you absolutely love doing. Glad you're feeling better!
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